How to Make Your New Year's Resolutions (Part I)

Every year we make New Year’s resolutions.  For example we say, we’re going to lose weight or we’re going to give up smoking or maybe we’re going to go back to school and get that degree we’ve always dreamt of having.  We definitely intend to work hard at our resolutions but after having “failed” once or twice we give up, thinking we can’t change.  Why does this happen and how can we change things so that our wonderful new goals actually become active and true parts of our lives?

Our old habits are hard to break because they started when we were little children.  It’s when we’re very young that we develop a set of beliefs that become central to the way in which we understand the world.  When we’re young we don’t know that we have the privilege of choice. We tend to model ourselves on the adults in our environment without question (you can read more about this in Lessons from a Life Coach, lesson one).  Our old beliefs can keep us stuck, interfering with progress and change and leading us to feel frustrated and unhappy.  Although we were molded, for good and for bad by our past, we can make changes in the present.  And we need to see what we perceive as failures as part of the natural process of personal growth.  We can move past our past!

Here are some important points to remember:

• Change takes time.  Even if you don’t lose the weight right away or you do smoke a cigarette or two one day, keep in mind that it has taken many years to create those old habits. 
• It’s going to take a while to change the things that you want to change. Committing to change also means making the conscious decision to accept yourself, imperfections and all
• We can only change ourselves. We can’t change other people.

Now, at the New Year, let’s make a resolution:  We’re not going to stay stuck anymore!  We will choose how we want to be and we will work at it, making a little bit of progress everyday.  And we will remember that making change takes time so we will resolve to love ourselves enough to be patient as we work toward a happier, more satisfying future!